When I was a wee 12-year-old, my parents took my family out to Cracker Barrel for my father’s birthday. I donned a little blue dress and smashed a whole bowl of beef stew and a slew of sides. By the time my family was done eating, I excused myself to bathroom stop #1.
In the Cracker Barrel bathroom, I peed and took note that my guts felt kind of crampy. Nothing too terrible or painful. In fact, being 12, I got excited because I thought the cramps meant that I was going to start my period. I was finally going to be a ~woman~. So in preparation for the predicted flow of blood, I packed my underpants with a wad of toilet paper, fixed my dress and exited the bathroom.